Here are some tips that can win friends and make us more likeable. 1) Use a person’s name in conversation; 2) smile; 3) give eye contact and really listen; 4) respond in ways that show you heard them; 5) give a compliment for a good job; 6) place criticism in between compliments; 7) ask for advice—this conveys that you don’t think you know everything. Healthy self-esteem begins by having a healthy view of God—that each person is unique and precious to God. Identify God-given abilities; use them to benefit others. As we benefit others, they affirm us and this boosts our sense of worth. Jesus warns us about using prideful ways to gain recognition. We read in Luke 14, “When you are invited to a wedding feast, don’t sit in the seat of honor. Instead, take the lowest place at the foot of the table. Then when your host sees you, he will come and say, ‘Friend, we have a better place for you!’ Then you will be honored in front of all the other guests. For those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.” The person who does not seek to exalt himself, but to honor God and others gains favor with both.
Dr. Melvin E. Banks, Sr.
Dr. Melvin E. Banks, Sr. is the founder and chairman of UMI (Urban Ministries, Inc.). Under his direction, UMI has grown to be a leading publisher of Christian education resources for churches in the African American community. Read More
